CRM software supplier Entellium claims to "empower small and medium sized businesses," but it looks like the Seattle company's CEO and CFO empowered themselves to pretend their small business was a few sizes bigger, to win $50 million from venture capitalists. "We are the old-fashioned type of entrepreneurs where you have to get revenue in order to spend," CEO Johnston told John Cook in 2004. When the revenue didn't come in fast enough, Johnston and......

Charges have been dismissed against a Federal Way woman who registered her Australian Shepherd/Terrier Mix, Duncan, to vote. Jane Balogh registered Duncan to vote in order to prove that Washington's policies are so lax that even a non-existent person--or a canine--could register to vote. A King County Judge dropped the charges Monday, after Balogh proved she had completed community service and paid $240 in court fees. Balogh swears Duncan never actually voted in an election.......

A Seattle-area man whose identity had been stumping the FBI has been identified with the help of his parents. The 52-year-old man had been arrested two weeks ago by federal authorities on charges of identity theft and fraud. The government had not been able to identify the man, who had been known to use over 30 aliases, because he had burned the tips of his fingers to alter his prints. The man who had......

Kurt might be amused to learn that, since 2003, at least one jackass criminal has been using his social security number to make fraudulent purchases. Said jackass has apparently skimmed some £36 million—about 5,000 million US dollars these days—from the deceased rock star's estate. "Mr. Cobain" might have continued his spending spree had he not slipped up in 2007; his purchase of a $3.2 million New Jersey mansion drew the attention of Courtney Love.......

Here are three vaguely computer-related crimes taken from recent headlines in Seattle, Chicago and New England. Seattle: "Man pleads guilty in cybertheft case." A 35-year-old Seattle man has pleaded guilty in federal court to mail fraud and aggravated identity theft in a scheme that utilized peer-to-peer file-sharing programs to gain access to private information from dozens of victims. Gregory Kopiloff admitted during a plea hearing Monday that, through LimeWire and other file-sharing programs, he used......

Seattlest's favorite crime (just edging Identity Theft) strikes again, this time in one of Seattlest's favorite places. A copper theft at Snoqualmie Pass temporarily disabled highway signs and safety lighting, which had to suck for people navigating the pass in the middle of the night. Don't mistake the fact that copper theft is Seattlest's favorite crime with Seattlest being in favor of the crime. It's bad and dangerous and taxpayers lose. Why is it our......

Save our Sonics & Storm appealed to Seattle pride in a letter to supporters today.In case you have not seen it Sonics and Storm fans have been "called out" in the Oklahoma City Newspaper owned by the Bennett family. This issue is getting national attention for the inept handling by ownership, the lack of leadership in our region, and the general apathy of the fans. NOW IT IS OUR TIME!The "calling out" they refer to......

A decomposed body was found in the house of ex-radio guy Mike Webb. We heard that first on the television, but we've been reading about Webb on the excellent Blatherwatch blog for a while now--they've been following Webb's fall for months, even from way back in the days before they had a special category for "Mike Webb Missing" on the blog. Webb used to be a liberal talk radio guy. He was charged with some......

Subject: Can you imagine that you are healthy? Although the dailies almost convinced us that spam as we know it has ended because Robert Alan Soloway was arrested yesterday, our inbox says otherwise. Subject: Orgasmotron It would seem that the zombie computers that Soloway has spamming away are still hard at work during his incarceration. Subject: So you asked for another message from Ms. Atkins, yeah? Or else he isn't solely responsible for the ruin......

We here in the Ist-A-Verse know that we're sensational, but it's very rare that we get a chance to be sensationalistic. This week, we've decided to have ourselves a little fun and try our hand at tacky tabloid headlines, using nothing more than our favorite posts from this week. Torontoist Special Report: Rosie to Trump: "Fire 300 Bicyclists for Fraud!" On DCist: Students Go Wild for Slogans, Secrets and Sexual Harassment The action was thick......

--Eddie Bauer resisted an attempt to sell the publicly-traded company to two private firms. --We're still kicking ourselves for being out of town this weekend and missing the science fiction short film fest at Cinerama. Here's a rundown of the films shown. (via Anita who you can still vote for over at Metblogs) --ATM fraud: it happened to us recently, and it sucked. Not on this scale though, because, well, we'd be tapped after......

In the future, when Vegas favors your Super Bowl opponent by a touchdown or more, it's best to consider that they're perpetrating some fraud on the betting public or simply don't know what they're talking about only after you've thought long and hard on the possibility that they indeed know exactly what they're talking about. You should, unlike Seattlest -- born and raised in the Windy City -- think long and hard on it before......

--Former talk show guy Mike Webb was found guilty of insurance fraud today. He's a "former" talk show guy in that he's no longer on the radio, but we understand he still broadcasts privately over the internet. --McDonalds coffee was found to be better than Starbucks by some magazine. Doesn't McDonalds serve Starbucks or are we dreaming that? --KEXP changes out the lightbulbs. How many deejays does it take. --If you like Gawker Stalker......

At the risk of beating the pulp of the dead horse, Seattlest knows that many are still without power at home. We feel a little remiss in that all that we can do is sit around and post lame things about it when, instead, we should be going out there and doing something about it. Well, the problem is that we have a barbarian's understanding of electric fundamentals. Sure, sure. We can wire up 12......

Get to work you worthless layabouts, and quit mooching off unemployment. Once upon an unemployed summer, Seattlest got very familiar with the hoops you gotta jump through to keep those checks coming. At one point we had to attend a class somewhere on Aurora, but week to week we just had to keep a little job searching log and if that log ever showed that we failed to apply for two positions a week (or......

Yes, Starbucks fucked up. Their "complimentary iced grande beverage" email coupon rapidly escalated beyond its intended audience, to no-one's surprise but Starbucks management's. They're embarrassed, and they should be -- it's a rookie Internet mistake, the kind of thing that we associate with the wild-'n'-woolly days of early '00 or so. But last Friday, the Goliath that is SBUX found its David -- a NY attorney with an overinflated sense of betrayal. From Starbucks......

JJ Hunsecker here. Those in the know think the trivia game at The Old Pequliar is starting to smell like yesterday's fish. You can usually find Seattlest there Tuesday nights, but we were unable to go this week. Turns out we missed quite an event. They had a guest host, a former quizmaster revisiting his glory days. Our friend, who's been their quizmaster for the last few months, attended as a player and emailed us......

When it's easier to find al-Qaida's top man in Iraq than the guy in charge of King County Elections, well, that's a bit of a problem. Currently, members of the county council are trying to pass an ordinance that would make county elections all-mail. On Monday they held a forum to hear from public officials and members of the public. However, the man they wanted to hear from the most, King County Elections Director Dean......

We know that if you had any intention of seeing the Da Vinci Code you’ve probably gone already, but just in case you still care, we saw it opening weekend at a packed-to-the-gills Pacific Place (we knew it’d be popular, but we didn’t expect to see a line waiting for the theater when the film ended) (also, we didn’t expect such an Old Navy-clad crowd, or that anyone would think it was an appropriate movie......

Just a quick nod to our brothers in ist down in Houston and their coverage of the Enron thing. The trial wrapped up today when Lay was found guilty of all the charges brought against him and Skilling was found guilty of most. From Houstonist: In what legal analysts are calling a "slam dunk" for the prosecution, the jury in the trial of Ken Lay and Jeff Skilling found the former Enron executives guilty of......

Once, Seattle had an afternoon paper. It was called the Seattle Times, and had sensible columnists like Emmett Watson who knew how to write a sentence. We can only assume it has no connection to the shrill, idiotic Seattle Times that now appears in the mornings. Anyway, the afternoon Times was there to tell you what happened while you were at work. Since it's gone, Seattlest steps into the void with our daily afternoon......

As the Mariners continue to stagger through the second week of the season our optimism following the 3-1 start has dropped a bit, okay a huge bit. We may need to take a break tonight since we have spent the last few games with our head in our hands. Tomorrow night Felix pitches, which is always fun to watch, and Friday night there is an interesting pitching match up (at least until the game begins)......

[See the end of this post for contest information. Win a shirt!] On April 7th, Asia Argento's film "The Heart is Deceitful Above All Things" based on JT LeRoy's collection of short stories will open at the Varsity. Asia Argento may look familiar to American audiences--she has played roles in xXx and Land of the Dead and can be seen in Sofia Coppola's upcoming Marie-Antoinette. It seems like a disparate and sparse list of films,......

DCist helps us make more sense of the world this week. Posts like this concert review are the reason for Scott Stapp. DCist also enumerates the reasons for playing ultimate frisbee, Condi’s tight buns, their love of a local convenience store, and their jealousy of a person in Seattle calling the city. LAist documented graf artist Banksy’s most recent visit to LA in one two three posts. They also found the best possible use......

Apparently Republicans don't like the U.S. Postal Service since liberals are able to perpetrate voter fraud by mail much more easily than conservatives. Naturally, the Sound Politics blog is all fired up about King County Executive Ron Sims' plan to make mail-in voting official for elections, maybe by next year. Seattlest has read both the Seattle Times and Seattle P-I stories on the issue and can't make out precisely what the big deal might be.......

Claiming that the Republicans did not show "clear and convincing" proof Judge John Bridges sided with the Democrats in the governor’s election trial. In his closing statement he said that the Republicans had failed to prove that illegal votes were the reason that Governor Gregoire won last November’s election, and furthermore there was no proof that the Democrats and King County Elections participated in voter fraud. The Republicans' best chance was that the court......

Judge John Bridges of Chelan County Superior Court just finished reading his ruling on last year's governor's election. He ruled against the Republicans, saying that for him to overturn the election based on proportional analysis, without proof of fraud, would be "the ultimate act of judicial activism." Sound Politics, Stefan Sharkansky's blog, will soon have something to entertainingly polemical to say, we'll bet. Both the P-I and Times will soon post stories about this......

Sure there may be bigger stories nationally, but locally all anyone can talk about is the governor election trial taking place in Wenatchee. The biggest problem for the Republicans during the trial is that they have no actual proof of premediated electoral fraud, just allegations. They currently argue that the Secretary of State’s office is biased, and claim that elections director Nick Handy is favoring the Democrats and helping the cause of county auditors......

Seattlest has often spent entire weekends staring in to space, fantasizing about what it would be like to be a live-in butler at a sorority house. Imagine our surprise when we found just such an opportunity on Craigslist, a posting since tragically deleted before Seattlest could archive the gem…but not before submitting our resume. Despite their feeble assertion to the contrary, the Banyan Manor is the manifestation of all of Seattlest’s hopes and dreams. The......

"Je voudrais s'offrir." We scan Craigslist for jobs every now and then. Not that Seattlest isn't happy with our current position, but sometimes it's nice to know what's out there. Well, we came across a listing yesterday that certainly tells us what's out there, and it's got Seattlest considering dropping a few of our most sacred vices, hanging up the keyboard, and heading for the french countryside. Consider this: Looking for vegan dependable,serious,responsible,enthusiastic,balanced female volunteer......